by Spencer Ackerman
from Wired Website
The sinister, shocking truth about
Barack Obama’s past lies not in east Africa, but in outer space. As
a young man in the early 1980s, Obama was part of a secret CIA
project to explore Mars. The future president teleported there,
along with the future head of
They swear: A youthful Barack Obama
was one of them.
Welcome - back - to Tinfoil Tuesday...
But that’s exactly what a secret chrononaut wants you to believe.
Obama wasn’t the only one making the otherworldly voyage.
As “Barry Soetero,” the 19-year-old
Obama was one of 10 youths selected to
secretly teleport to and from
Mars, forming a band of interplanetary Teen Titans.
Regina Dugan, the director of
DARPA, was another member.
Basiago, a fellow chrononaut, told the website Exopolitics that he saw Obama,
To acknowledge his comrade, Obama is said to have told Basiago,
It is not known what exactly Obama did on Mars (socializing Martian health care, perhaps? Building a birth-certificate printing press?)
His mission was a perilous one, according to Basiago and Stillings.
The CIA wished to “establish a defense regime protecting the Earth from threats from space” as well as a legal claim to “territorial sovereignty,” making Obama something of a Martian conquistador.
Presumably, Obama’s CIA handlers needed him to,
You can scoff at the idea of Obama on Mars. But it explains a lot.
Obviously the birth-certificate controversy is a side effect of Obama forgetting to sufficiently establish his fake identity as he learned to manipulate time and space. (Dugan has a demonstrated record of supporting space travel; the “jump room” must be broken.)
And who else but a man accustomed to keeping the country’s most explosive secret would be comfortable waging so many undeclared wars? Ignore Basiago and Stillings at your own peril.
If Obama’s reelected, the U.S. is
finally colonizing Mars...